Cold Approach 101 - Daygame Masterclass
Daygame has changed my life. Here's exactly how you can do it too.
Approaching in the daytime is one of the hardest things for guys to do.
In my estimation 90% of guys will go their entire lives without approaching a woman in a sober, daytime setting.
That’s a bit sad considering how many times most guys see beautiful women they’d sacrifice one inch of their dick to even just buy a coffee for.
Yet they don’t say anything. They give up in their heads before the game has even begun. They reject themselves and never take a risk.
Meeting a woman in the daytime only takes a minute and could lead you to your future wife, amazing relationships, or the most exciting night of your life you tell your grandkids about :)
But guys never do it.
They don’t know how, they lack confidence, they don’t want to be embarassed, etc.
I lived with this fear for 10 years ever since realizing I liked girls. I wouldn’t talk to them.
Since then, I decided finally to overcome it over the past 2 years and my life has completely changed.
I’ve gotten laid countless times, created relationships with amazing, beautiful women around the world, and I feel confident and at peace with myself for the first time in my life.
I’m not saying getting laid and creating amazing relationships is everything in life. But I’ve realized it really helps.
And day time approaching is one of the best tools I’ve found to do so.
Heres exactly how I did it all the way from 10 years of approach anxiety to complete confidence in myself.
Cold Approach Guide – Daygame Masterclass
Table of Contents
1. Introduction
Why daytime approaching is hard
Why most guys never do it
My transformation and why daygame matters
2. Core Principles
Why game works (behavior > looks)
Evolutionary psychology and attraction
Modern world and “fake it till you make it”
Why cold approach solves dating problems
Why daygame > nightgame
3. The Plan
Goals and action
Knowing what kind of girl and relationship you want
Consistency and building habits
30-day challenge framework
4. Approach Anxiety
Why fear is normal
Shifting from taking to giving value
Warm-up routine
Leverage and accountability trick
5. Your Next 10 Approaches
Daily 3-step warmup
Example openers
Building momentum
6. Your Next 10 Numbers
From opening to closing
Self-belief and mindset
Angles and positioning
Voice, tonality, and directness
Simple number-closing lines
What to do next: text, date, repeat
Opening
In order to even get to the Opening, you have to act.
But, action is hard without a Plan.
And your Plan wont work if you don’t believe in it.
So, first, you’ll get clarity on the Core Principles that make game possible for nyone.
Then, you’ll use my System to create a Game plan for your next 10 approaches.
Lastly, you’ll turn that Plan into your next 10 phone numbers.
Want to achieve your dream dating life? Apply to work with me here.
Core Principles
In order to even start practicing, we must first understand why game is possible for anyone and sell ourselves on the idea of it.
Why Game Works
Game works because attraction is behavioral.
Attraction is not based on the way your jaw looks, your height or how much money you have.
To understand this more deeply, we have to look at a bit of psychology, the environment from which we evolved and how it compares to the modern world.
Evolutionary Psychology
Women get attracted to men who are displaying qualities of leadership, assertiveness, courage, positivity, abundance, assuredness & aliveness.
They get attracted because if they have a child with someone that has these traits, the child will likely possess these same traits and be able to survive in the harsh environment from which we evolved as well as pass his genes on to the next generation.
These attractive traits were good for evolution and survival.
In our modern world where these traits are not as relevant, we, as humans, still have the same animalistic brain that was attracted to these traits in the environment from which we evolved: the plains of Africa where lions are killing everyone.
We lived on those plains only ~100,000 years ago.
The brain does not have time to evolve in 100,000 years.
A good jawline or being over 6’ would be highly irrelevant on the plains of Africa.
What matters more is your ability to lead a tribe, communicate, fight, make decisions, come to agreements, find food and find safety.
Ability & behavior not looks or height.
The Modern World
Using cold approach as a means of self improvement was not possible in the tribal environment from which we evolved.
In that tribe, everyone has known each other since the time they were born.
So, if you try to step up and be someone you are not, you will get shut down.
They know everything about you, good or bad.
They know if you were bullied when you were younger.
They know that you can’t hunt or fight.
They know that you might be one of the weakest links of the tribe.
They know who you really are.
Luckily for us, we don’t live in a small tribal environment anymore.
We live in a world of almost 8 billion people.
No one knows each other.
Thus, cold approach is born.
Now, we can walk up to strangers who know nothing about us and be someone completely different, if we choose, every single time.
If we want to act like the sexiest guy in the world that has gotten girls his entire life and had everything given to him since he was born, we can do that.
And thats essentially what we are trying to do on a cold approach.
In the beginning, we are approaching strangers and acting like that sexiest man alive.
Eventually, through repetition, habit and practice, this becomes our reality.
Fake it til you make it.
That is why cold approach works.
Why Cold Approach
Cold approach solves all dating problems guys are experiencing in 2024.
Guys are not getting likes online
We know that online is based on things out of our control.
Go talk to girls in the real world. We know that game is behavioral.
Guys don’t have social skills
Get social skills by talking to girls in the real world
Low competition in 2024
Pre pandemic, many people were getting into cold approach. The pandemic basically wiped it out and reset everyone
Guys don’t have control over who they get matched with online
Cold approach gives you choice and ability
Guys don’t have abundance
Cold approach gives you limitless abundance. There are 3 billion+ women currently.
Guys are scared of rejection
Go get rejected and deal with the pain and get over it.
Day game > Night game
For me, at this point in my life, day game is a better solution than night game.
I am an introvert.
I like peace, I like quiet.
I enjoy being productive and working normal hours.
I don’t like:
Being out late into the night
Being around a bunch of drunk people
Spending money on bar / club entrance fees
Buying drinks
Getting drunk
Being unhealthy
Waking up late
Losing sleep
Buying Ubers
Inflated night life costs
Loud music
Trying to talk over said music
Drunk tired sex
I do like:
Genuinely getting to know a girl
Having a regular schedule
Getting sleep
Getting up early
Being productive
Doing things I want to do
Having the energy to do what I want to do
Being healthy
Thinking clearly
Learning and expanding
Just to name a few.
The Plan
Two parts to The Plan:
Goals
Action
Without a Goal, you are a ship without a rudder.
Without Action, real progress is impossible.
Most people fail because they don’t have a plan that they can consistently execute on.
Goals
“If you want something you’ve never had, you must be willing to do something you’ve never done.”
If you don’t know what you are looking for, you will never find it.
Having a clear idea of the type of girl and relationship you are looking for will guide your actions towards that outcome.
What type of relationship do you want?
Girlfriend
Wife
Multiple Long-Term Relationships
One Night Stands
A Combination
What type of girl(s) are you looking for?
What traits does she possess?
What does she look like?
How does she treat you?
How does she treat others?
How educated is she?
What is her family like?
What does she do for fun?
What type of job does she have?
My notes from when I started in 2023:
Consistency
Many people have an idea that they will just get the approaches done as they are going about their daily activities.
For me and most people I teach, this is not the case.
Your brain will trick you in that moment and give you all of the excuses why you shouldn’t.
Getting started with cold approach was a massive hurdle to overcome for me and needed to be systematically attacked from every possible angle.
Set time aside and work on your game.
Don’t leave it up to chance.
Ask Yourself:
Where are the girls in your city?
When are they there? And on which days?
How many days a week do you want to dedicate to cold approach?
30 Day Challenge
I recommend at least 2-3 days of at least 3 approaches per session.
When I was starting, I did 3 approaches every single day.
You need a decent sample size of data to learn from.
If you do less, you are either not learning at all or learning too slowly.
Rather than spending a certain amount of time at the location, make your goal to do X approaches.
In Miami, I did 3 approaches every day, no matter what. I usually do 5-10 now.
Make it a priority if it is one for you.
It takes 30 days to build a habit. It will be difficult to be consistent at first. But if you can keep pushing, it will become easier as the habit builds.
Before moving on, you should consider mapping out which days you will be approaching on, where you will go and how many approaches you will be doing each session.
Then, put it into your schedule.
Approach Anxiety
Approach anxiety was literally the biggest problem in my life after high school.
Since the time I found out about game until I did my first approach was an agonizing 6 years.
I had read all sorts of manuals, tips tricks guides solutions and everything under the sun.
Nothing has worked for me like the following.
And the best part is that its the simplest.
Mindsets
First, we have to understand that it is completely normal to be scared to approach.
Fear is normal. Fear keeps us alive.
However, in the modern world, this fear of rejection is no longer rational.
There is no tribe that we get kicked out of if we do something dumb anymore.
There is no longer a risk of death if we get rejected or act out of line.
Giving
List out 5 unique qualities about yourself that girls would like to know you for.
Reframe your mind to be that of giving value instead of taking value.
Imagine someone comes up to you and just gives you money and says have a great day.
You are doing the same but with human emotion, connection and experience
You are providing a unique, fun and special moment for her.
Not often does she get her day interrupted by a good person who likes her and wants to meet her.
Know that you are giving value and a positive experience when you approach her.
Warmup
I did this warmup every single day before doing my approaches for my first 3 months.
“Where is starbucks?”
“I like your outfit. Have a nice day”
“Hey i just had to say I thought you were cute. Have a nice day”
Do your approaches. Approaches mean different things for different people at this point.
Leverage
Send a trustworthy friend money (whatever amount you don’t want to lose is fine)
Text them: “if you don’t get 3 videos or audios of me approaching by (time) then you get to keep it”
Either sit around and forfeit your money or approach, record it and send it. You pick.
Your Next 10 Approaches
These are the warmups I still use to this day and have done for 9+ months.
Taking action is key. Start small and build up.
Once you get better, then use this 3 step process as a warmup before your actual approaches.
Do 3 each day with this format for 3 days.
Send your friend money and text them: “If you don’t get a video or audio of me doing this in the next 60 minutes, you keep it.
Hey where is Starbucks? (Directions)
Hey I like your outfit. Have a nice day. (Compliment + Eject)
Hey I like your outfit. Whats your name? Im ___ . (Compliment + Conversation)
Your Next 10 Numbers
Now, that you have done your first (or next) 10 approaches, lets turn those into numbers.
First, we’ll do it by refining your open then always closing.
A good approach is always composed of at least two pieces: an Open and a Close.
If you open and close, you are doing better than 99%.
The rest is refinement.
e video game drug addict nerd from china town PC cafes until 4 in the morning every night to someone who is creating the life of his dreams and doing what he loves while getting paid to do it.
Your mind is a beautiful thing.
Learn how to use it and you are unstoppable.
Your mindset and belief systems are the place your words and actions come from.
If your words and actions are coming from the wrong place, no amount of charisma, charm or wit can save you.
Get your mind right and the pieces of the puzzle fall right into place.
Belief Framework
Some days, you feel like you can walk on water.
Everything is going well.
Everyone loves you and you’re on top of the world.
Unfortunately this is not the case the majority of the time.
If you want true results, you have to learn how to manage how you feel, even on bad or regular days.
If you are a good person with a functioning brain, approaching a girl inherently means that you believe in yourself.
You have to believe you are better than other guys in order to even approach at all.
You approach because you believe that you are the best option for her and she is better off having met you.
The most powerful ways I have found to create belief: self talk & memory.
Self Talk
John Maxwell says Begin With the End in Mind.
Know what your goal is and see it in your minds eye.
This philosophy allows your thoughts, words and actions to come from a place of belief because you know exactly where you are headed.
Whenever I approach a girl, my first thought is, “I am going to fuck this girl”.
Aggressive? Yes. But, it gives me belief while aligning my entire ecosystem of thoughts, words and actions in the right direction.
Youtube video: Self talk:
Owen Cook, one of the greatest internet marketers ever, says every time he is about to do something, he will tell himself things like:
“This is going to be the best video I ever make”
“That was amazing. That approach was perfect”
“This approach is going to be the best moment of this girls entire life”
“11/10 perfect.”
“No self doubt. I will win. Belief. I am the best”
He says his belief is like the tip of a pointed spear. Again and again he will say things like this to himself until he wins.
Bryan Tracy, one of the greatest salesmen of all time does the same. “I like myself”
Talk to yourself and force your brain to get on your side. Until you win.
Memory
Think of your biggest successes of all time. In life, dating, business or school.
Use those memories and feelings to give you courage when you need it.
Think of an attractive girl you’ve been with or just imagine being with a really hot girl.
Recalling those feelings of victory can flood your body with the alpha chemicals necessary to take risk.
Write down 5 reasons why you are the best option for any girl.
Make them up if you have to. But you need something. Why are you the best?
You need to believe you are the best in order to approach her.
If you don’t believe, you will not approach.
Look at that list every day and remind yourself of those reasons when you aren’t at your best.
Angles
Side stop 3rd person:
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Side stop 1st person:
@talktogirlsIm selling 3 tickets for saturdays nyc meet in bio
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Front stop 3rd person:
@talktogirls@talktogirls ♬ original sound - Trai
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Front stop 1st person:
@talktogirlsSkool group in bio closing 8/1. 3 spots left
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Walking with 3rd person:
Walking With 3rd person:
Sitting:
@talktogirls@talktogirls ♬ original sound - Trai
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Stationary:
Angle adjusting:
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Words
Words are the conveyor belt for your inner ecosystem of thoughts, beliefs and feelings.
They are the outward reflection of who you are.
There are technical and psychological aspects to the words which, when said from the right place, have a powerful effect.
Volume
Louder is almost always better.
The louder you are the better things that says about you.
Until its so loud that you scare her.
Be loud up to that point.
Being loud conveys you have been the center of attention before and have been rewarded for that behavior.
Implying social proof.
The louder the better.
Tonality
Dont read too much into this but just keep a nice even tone as if you are talking to a friend or a girl you are already sleeping with.
Avoid trying for rapport by going up at the end of your sentences as if asking a question.
You want to almost be talking down to the girl to be conveying good value.
Your tone should be subtly saying “I know i’m cool.”
Degrees of Directness
[10/10] You have a super fucking cute look [Link]
[9/10] You are absolutely stunning [Link]
[8/10] You look absolutely cute (elaboration) [Link]
[7/10] You have an adorable fit (elaboration) [Link]
[6/10] You just have like a cute look (elaboration) [Link]
[4/10] I just loved your outfit [Link]
[3/10] You are kind of cute [Link]
[2/10] You have the same shoes as me [Link]
[1/10] Were you going over here? [Link]
The Close
There are different types of closes.
For now just stick to the following simple ones.
How to do it: ask.
I know we didn’t talk much about what to say. But for now, keep it simple.
Use small talk and just regular conversation. As long as you have complimented her on the open, intent is there.
So, you don’t have to get extra fancy here.
Things to say:
Interview Mode: Interviewing is totally okay practice for a beginner and will get you further than trying to be perfect or reading too much into it.
What do you do around here?
What are you up to?
You go to school here?
Ask for the number.
2 simple number ask formats that cover all bases:
“You seem cool. Lets grab a drink sometime. Whats your #?”
“You’re actually cooler than expected. How do you feel about a coffee or a smoothie sometime?”
Formula:
(Qualify her) + (Future plans) + (Ask)
Me closing numbers:
“How do you feel about a coffee or smoothie..”:
“How about at some point we get a drink..”:
“We should get a drink at some point..”:
Me closing an instant date:
“You should get a drink with a cute boy really quick”:
Next steps:
Use this to get 10 numbers.
Text those numbers.
More here on texting:
Go on dates.
More here on running first dates:
Nice job. Now you have 10 numbers of girls that you like.
Once you have done something once, you can do it a million times.
If you have questions, ask them in the Subscriber chat here and I will answer every question every week. substack.com/chat/6173212
-Peter